Given the way that SOE has been changing things in EQ I thought it would be interesting to look a few months into the future to see how EQ will evolve and change....
March 2, 2003 - The trolls have been kicked out of Neriak for being too sloppy. Since no one else wants them, they disappear off the face of Norrath forever. Troll characters are automatically deleted from all player accounts with this patch.
March 27, 2003 - An army of Mosquito Men attacks Oggok and takes over the former Ogre city. In frustration, the Ogres also leave Norrath forever. Ogre characters are automatically deleted from all player accounts with this patch. The city of Oggok is renamed Omalaria.
April 2, 2003 - An army of Wild Mushroom Men attacks Cabilis and gives the Iksar the boot. Iksars also leave Norrath forever. Iksar characters are automatically deleted from all player accounts with this patch. The city of Cabilis is renamed Capsandstems.
April 3, 2003 - The Dark Elves throw a week long party to celebrate their status as the primo (and only) evil race.
April 10, 2003 - While the Dark Elves are recovering from their drunken stupor, an army of vicious Blueberry Pixies take over Neriak. The Dark Elf race is utterly wiped out. Dark Elf characters are automatically deleted from all player accounts with this patch. The city of Neriak is renamed Merryak. All statues of Innoruuk are destroyed by the pixies and replaced with statues of their god, Papasmurf.
April 17, 2003 - A change is made to help balance the classes. The change is as follows: Druids now get Instant-Complete heal (0 mana) and 100% xp rez (0 mana) at Level 1. In addition, at creation, druids get the following newbie weapon: Club of the Whiner: 400 damage, 1 delay, AC+4000, HP+10000, MANA+10000, Flowing Thought 200, AGI+125, STA+125, STR+125, WIS+125, INT+125, DEX+125, SvF+200, SvM+200, SvC+200, SvP+200, SvD+200, Effect: God Mode (Invincibility from attack for 8 hours, recast time 2 seconds, clickable with unlimited charges). SOE hopes that this will help balance the classes. No changes to any other classes are necessary as the druid class is the only class that is grossly underpowered.
April 21, 2003 - Another class-balance change. Druids are now the only class allowed to do trade skills of any kind. Trade skills of druids are innately set to 250 for all skills at level 1 with a skill cap of 250. Trade skills for all other classes are reset to 0 regardless of current skill.
May 2, 2003 - All heal and rez spells have been removed from the cleric class. Those clerics that already had these spells have had the spells automatically deleted from their spell book. It is hoped that this will help druids more easily get a group, as they are very underpowered compared to all other classes. To help clerics compensate for the lose of these spells they have been given a new spell called "Summon: Nail" to go with their summoned hammer.
May 23, 2003 - Since the druid class has no way to make plat (being they are so underpowered) the following changes have gone into effect. When a non-Druid character loots a corpse, 96% of the plat will automatically be split amongst the druids in zone. Additionally, all other items on the corpse will be split amongst the druids standing closest to the player until the supply of lootable items is exhausted. All remaining plat will be available to the looter.
May 24, 2003 - Emergency patch - percentage of plat given to druid raised to 100%. Also, every time a non-druid loots a corpse, 10 plat is removed from him and given to the nearest druid.
June 12, 2003 - Shamans will no longer get slow spells, buffing spells, dots or pet spells. Shamans with these types spells already will find the spells have automatically been deleted from their spell books. Druids gain a few minor slow, buffing, dot and pet spells.
June 13, 2003 - Wizards will no longer get teleport and DD spells. Wizards with these types spells already will find the spells have automatically been deleted from their spell books. Druids gain a few minor teleport and DD spells.
June 14, 2003 - Mages will no longer get pet spells. Mages with these types spells already will find the spells have automatically been deleted from their spell books. Druids gain a few minor pet spells.
June 15, 2003 - Bards will no longer get songs. Bards who already have songs will find they have automatically been deleted. Druids gain a few songs.
June 16, 2003 - Enchanter will no longer get mana enhancement spells or mez spells. Enchanters who already have songs will find they have automatically been deleted. Druids gain a few mana enhancement spells and mez spells.
June 28, 2003 - Epic quests and weapons have been deleted from all classes except the druid class. For those non-druids who already have their epic, a new fearsome weapon will replace their previous epic weapon: The Club, 1 damage, 87 delay. Those already possessing their epic will find their new epic already equipped. It may not be unequipped hence, The Club becomes the only primary weapon they can use for the life of the character. Druids gain 14 new epic weapons that have automatically been added to their inventory.
June 29, 2003 - Emergency patch - druids who had not yet gotten the original druid epic are automatically given this epic. SOE sincerely apologizes for this oversight.
June 30, 2003 - Warriors, Paladins, Monks and Shadow Knights are no longer allowed to carry weapons. This small additional change is hoped to help out the poor underpowered druid class more easily get groups.
July 6, 2003 - SOE has redone the way experience is received per kill. Druids will receive an experience bonus: 1 level per kill regardless of their existing level or level of mob. If a druid is level 65, 10 AA points per kill will be given. All other classes will receive an experience penalty as follows: for every mob killed, the player loses 1 tick of experience unless the mob killed is 60 levels higher than the player and the player is soloing. In the case where the character has solo killed a mob that is a minimum of 60 levels higher, the player will receive 1 point of experience and then have his account terminated since he was obviously cheating.
July 12, 2003 - A long awaited expansion pack was released this month named "Have you hugged a druid today". The expansion pack came with the first ever EQ bumper sticker (with the expansion pack title printed boldly in hot pink). SOE introduced a new technology with this release - the bumper stick must be prominently displayed on the user's vehicle or the software will not install. Those user's who tried installing without first putting the bumper sticker on their car, promptly had their hard drives reformatted. This is also the first pack that must be purchased and installed - those who do not buy the pack are no longer allowed to enter the game.
July 19, 2003 - Big changes in the bazaar occurred. All items sold by players in the bazaar are now free to druids. All other classes must pay a 20% tax to help fund this new advanced game play feature called "Robin Drood Tax". SOE sited that all those other powerful and rich classes will be giving a small donation to the poor and underpowered druids in order to help balance gameplay.
July 23, 2003 - Another class change. Druids are allowed to equip any item regardless of race/class/deity restriction. No changes to any other classes are necessary as the druid class is the only class that is grossly underpowered.
August 12, 2003 - All existing deities have been banished from the world and a new deity has arisen to take the place of all other deities. This new deity is named: Druids.
August 28, 2003 - At level 2: druids get a new skill, 'Deathtouch zone' which can be used once every 20 seconds. This skill kills all mobs and non-druidplayers in zone and gives appropriate XP to the druid. Additionally the druid may loot any items off any NPC or PC corpse they wish, regardless of PVP status. It is hoped that this balances the classes and gives the poor unfortunate and ignored druid class a small boost.
September 1, 2003 - At level 3: druids get a new skill, "Temper Tantrum" which allows them to banish, at will, any non-druid players account from the game for the life of the player. Players that have been banished will still be responsible for paying SOE their monthly access fee for the rest of their lives, even though they will never be allowed to play EQ again.
September 14, 2003 - At level 4: druids get a new skill, "Taxation" which when used, all non-druid players in the same zone will have a transfer of 100 plat automatically performed from their person or bank to the druid performing the skill. Players who do not have sufficient plat will be banned from the game for life.
September 23, 2003 - At level 5: druids receive the spells for all other caster classes for all levels with the ability to cast any of these spells mana-free. These spells will automatically appear in the spell book without having to be purchased, quested for, looted, scribed, etc. Additionally, all other caster classes lose their ability to cast.
October 1, 2003 - SOE announces that no more class balancing will be forthcoming as they feel the classes are finally perfectly balanced. Patches also will not be released in order for the SOE development team to take a long awaited Drooidick holiday.
March 1, 2004 - SOE announced today that their number of subscribers has fallen very slightly since last year. The current number of subscribers is 400. In a separate survey, SOE was surprised to find that fully 99.8% of their subscribers were playing druids. In a quote, SOE VP of Tree-hugging stated, "It just shows the quality of the people who are playing in that they have all chosen the most difficult class to play, the poor and lowly druid. Our subscribers have stepped up and chosen a class that has been under-powered and ignored. We at SOE feel, in order to reward these heroes of Norrath, the development team will work the next few months on some class balancing issues to hopefully make the druid class an easier and more fun class to play."